I Love Riding in the City
NAME: Aaron Pratt
LOCATION: Columbus, OH
OCCUPATION: Youth Corruption, Graduate School
Where do you live and what’s it like riding in your city?
Columbus is a city that used to have a werewolf... or I should say, still does. Sometimes when I ride to Dirty Franks to eat hot dogs, what appears—at least prima facie—to be the wind’s howl is actually Michael J. Fox as a nastier version of Teen Wolf riding Nicole Kidman’s bike from BMX Bandits. Fortunately, Christopher Columbus still manufactures silver bullets, so it’s only a temporary problem. Columbus also has a very fine replica of the Santa Maria. I recommend riding to it.
What was your favorite city to ride in, and why?
Roughly a fortnight ago, I dreamed that I installed a flux capacitor on my Vivalo and rode to 12th-century England. I had lunch with Gerald of Wales and then pulled off some flawless Hadrian’s Wallrides. Even though the wall was already more than one thousand years old at that point, a constable still gave me a citation. I think I like Columbus better.
Why do you love riding in the city?
I love riding in the city because it saves me a rather significant amount of money and because I love to eat. There are, as you may very well know, many eateries in mid-size cities like Columbus. In order to get to these places, I ride my bicycle. I once had the idea that I could ride to Thai Tanic in Washington DC faster if I rode two bikes at the same time, but it didn’t work out. Bummerzone.
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