Urban Velo

The “End” of the LanceWrong Saga

ET oprahSo, it’s happening. Just one more day and the last pillar in Lance’s house of cards comes tumbling down. Mostly. Fortunately, you don’t have to wait for the big shebang and can get a jump on everyone else by reading this portion of the transcript, smuggled out by someone on set during the interview. It’s where Lance really lays it all out. (Spoiler, not really).

Yeah, it’s a total joke, but hey, if we have to be exposed to this crap one final time, let’s at least have some fun with it. I mean, come on, this is the Super Bowl of spectacle for athletes. This is OUR time. Admit it, you’ve had to grit your teeth as your facebook feed gets drowned in cryptic Downtown Abbey play by plays or god awful Honey Boo Boo references…or cats for chrisesakes. Cats!!!

Now, we get to have our fun, coming up with every possible alternative to the LiveStrong moniker, self-righteously I-Told-You-So’ing in all caps, and generally giving the rest of society a taste of their own medicine.

Whether you wanted Lance to be clean all this time or just KNEW he was full of crap, or EPO’s or whatever magic concoction gets you over those mountains, grab yourself a water bottle and bowl of Sport Beans and let’s watch our own personal Donald Trump tap dance his way around all the pending lawsuits knocking on his door. Then let’s move on to building a culture of truly clean athletes.

The interview airs over two nights starting Thursday at 9 ET on the Oprah Winfrey Network and finishes on Friday. It’s also streaming here.

About Scott Spitz

Commuting, touring, kid hauling, couriering, mechanic work, sales, advocacy, fixed, free—Scott has had his hands in it all over the years.

View all posts by Scott Spitz →

4 Comments

  1. Bike HermitJanuary 16, 2013 at 12:08 pm

    I don’t think we will hear about this “one final time”. It will be interesting to hear what he says and what it will mean for sponsors, team owners and the UCI. Oh, and the lawyers. It’s just getting interesting!

  2. TerryJanuary 16, 2013 at 10:09 pm

    I tried to care about pro bicycle racing once, but it didn’t take. I still don’t care. Hopefully, though, the powers that be will quit spending money looking for dopers from long past bicycle racing that are pretty dang meaningless for 99.99999999999999999% of the world’s population.

  3. adamJanuary 16, 2013 at 10:23 pm

    CATS! Don’t be hatin’ on cats! Cats are timeless! Lance on the other hand is boooooooooooring!

  4. TonyJanuary 17, 2013 at 11:21 am

    Nicole Cooke used part of her retirement news conference to lob some verbal bombshells at Armstrong: “When Lance ‘cries’ on Oprah this week and she passes him the tissue, spare a thought for all those genuine people who walked away with no rewards – just shattered dreams.”

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